My son is back and I have no idea why I missed him for even a minute.
He got up in the middle of the night to raid the fridge. Good thing I was expecting him back any time -- for an entire week -- so the pantry was well-stocked! (tiny update: silly boy took out a package of very ancient pita bread and only noticed the spots of blue mold after he'd bitten into a slice. One wonders why he reached right past the perfectly fresh, new loaf of multigrain bread on his way to getting the stiff-as-cardboard pita? Teens R blind?)